This was a weekend of many emotions.
Friday, I received news of a leadership transition happening in my spiritual community. It was not unexpected, but leaves many questions about what will happen next. There is sadness, optimism, and uncertainty.
I’ve been part of a group caroling for a ceasefire in Gaza. It’s a beautiful way to marry my love of singing with something I feel deeply about. War will never result in peace.
Saturday was our second action of this kind and we did so at an event where people were gathering and there were quite a few police. More uncertainty mixed with conviction, a deep sense of knowing that peace begins with me, and the uncertainty of how we would be received.
Yesterday, our Sunday celebration was a shared service with three other faith communities. It was beautiful and moving. I sang of course, but I also participated in our movement choir. We danced to Joyful, Joyful – the version from Sister Act. Fun. Playful. Joyful. Vulnerable.
The vulnerability of these few days has left me wide open.
As we sang From A Distance (Bette Midler) before closing the service yesterday, much of our community was in tears. I struggled to get the words out in places as did some of my fellow singers. The gratitude, compassion, and love were palpable in the room and I was feeling all of it, deeply.
Isn’t this what life is all about? Didn’t we come here to feel it all?
Moving through the uncertainty, into the mystery, the unknown; into what’s next and what’s new. Sometimes our comfort zone is broken open by events we can’t foresee, such as the changes in my spiritual community. Other times, we are willing to march right into them – caroling for a ceasefire, dancing before an audience.
Each of these experiences have changed me, some in ways I have yet to recognize.
In our Curated Conversations this morning, the question was asked, “why do you do what you do?”. There are lots of reasons for me. I want to create positive change in the world. I want to help women who are ready cultivate a deep self-intimacy and find their own voice in their own way. But the simplest answer and perhaps the most difficult one to articulate is; this is who I am and how I must move about the world now.
Today, I send you love, and permission if you feel you need it, to be exactly who you are here to be, now. Not if. Not when. And, if you are looking for support in that self-discovery process, I am here for you.
ps: it’s completely normal to feel tired when moving through emotional situations…give yourself permission to rest, too. That’s exactly what I’m doing today. XO