I don’t know about you, but I have an interesting relationship with social media. It’s been this was for quite some time…years perhaps. I find it draining and at the same time I think I ‘should’ be using it…and it’s never a good idea to should on myself. Maybe you can relate. So, I made the decision to do something about it. I got clean, and here’s how.

Up until now, I’d been listening more to other people’s ideas and beliefs about social media trying to sort it all out for myself. I recall a conversation with another coach about it and she was adamant that if you’re not on social media you won’t connect with your ‘people’. I felt rather embarrassed and wondered if I was just being stubborn. So, I persisted to use these platforms even thought my truest desire was for something else. Something that felt more authentic.

Like many of you, spending more time at home during a pandemic has given me lots of opportunity to pause, reflect, and get clear on what truly matters. Health. Family. Relationships. Business. I think many of us are in the throes of reimagining ourselves and our lives as a result of current circumstances.

You change the world by being yourself

The irony of my social media dilemma is not lost on me. I’m the coach who helps women stop second guessing themselves. Nevertheless here I am second guessing myself. This is precisely why we all need a life coach. The most loving thing we can do for ourselves is to question everything we think and believe. Most of our thinking is unhealthy and self-defeating and working with a coach can help us see more clearly through our own muck. Are you curious how I got clean?

Honor your feelings…they’re your guides

First, I took time to be with my feelings. Not something that comes easily for many of us, and when it comes to uncomfortable feelings most of us want to dismiss them. I had noticed for some time that when I am using social media, I experience a sense of anxiety in my gut. It simply felt like I was doing something that I didn’t really want to be doing. For the first few days of this hiatus that sense of anxiety got really strong, which I recognize now as that fear of missing out. I was saying no to the desire to go back.

I kept reminding myself why I was doing this and the anxiety subsided. It was replaced by a subtle, almost undetectable feeling of being free. This was the whisper of my inner wisdom, what is deeply true for me.

Don’t believe everything you think

Then, I curious about my thoughts. Here’s an important note. Feelings are always the result of our thoughts. We think circumstances cause how we feel, but this is never true. I talk about this in my book, 3 Secrets to a Kickass Life. Feelings are the body’s vibrational response to what we think about a situation or person or circumstance. Louise Hay said it beautifully, “I don’t fix problems. I fix my thinking then problems fix themselves.”

That sense of uneasiness when I use social media was my body telling me that I was out of alignment with what I truly wanted. That I was holding onto a belief that I’d miss out on clients or business growth or something if I wasn’t on social media. I also realized part of what kept me there was the thought that I want to be seen and heard yet it seemed that I was quite invisible.

Finally, I took a good hard look at how this is affecting my life? In a word, I was creating inconsistency in how I showed up…on social media, in other areas of my business and this dear friends resulted in inconsistent business results. Definitely not what I want.

When I got clean on my feelings and thoughts, I was able to ask better questions of myself. How do I want to feel, think, and show up in my life and my business? I got clear on what feels true and right for me and started showing up in that way consistently. I got clean by getting clear.

So often we, women, second guess ourselves. We spend a lot of energy and brain space hesitating, vacillating, and deliberating rather than letting our inner wisdom be our guide. When I listened to what felt true for me, it was ease to consciously show up in ways that feel empowered and much more authentically me.

I got clean by getting clear

I do want to be seen and heard. Heck…I have a business and that means putting myself out there. It would be self-defeating if I didn’t. At the same time, I want to do that in a way that feels genuine, and for me that’s being present with people one to one or in groups. Building relationships, collaborations, teaching, speaking, and coaching. I’m much more focused on this today and seeing the results I want in my business and in my life. It’s like watching myself evolve before my own eyes. Pretty cool. Right?

You get to decide who you want to be

I’m not knocking anyone who loves and uses social media. What I am saying is that each one of us is meant to evolve and grow into our most authentic awesome selves and that looks different for each of us. That no matter what anyone else thinks, you know the best way for you. You’ll always know the truth by the way you feel.

What’s one thing that you are second guessing about yourself and your life? What if you got clean by getting clear and changed one thing. Just one. And committed to that change…committed to you! Not someday, or if things improve or when you feel like it…because it’s always now and you’re already awesome. There’s nothing to wait for.

Who would you become in the process? I’m here when you’re ready to decide.

From my heart to yours,

Ready to stop second guessing your awesomeness and live your wildest dreams?! Schedule a call. Let’s, together, reimagine what’s possible for you.