Love Letter #148: I’m Meant to Be ‘Out There’
I was talking with a friend the other day about being ‘out there’. I’ve always felt a little out there and for a lot of my life, I tried to be normal and fit in. I don’t have a lot of memories of my childhood, but I do have this felt memory, a sense of being laughed at and feeling humiliated for thinking differently and expressing those thoughts. I learned to be quiet and keep things to myself. Maybe you can relate to this.
But I’m at a point in my life where I’m done trying to fit in to be liked. I must be who I am and share that with the world and let what happens happen. This is a powerful kind of surrender. Letting go of what others think after a lifetime of caring, pleasing, and perfecting is terrifying and liberating. Honestly, I vacillate between the two.
As I’ve journeyed through this year of love letters, I’ve become bolder in my writing. I’ve also started to talk about and share my spiritual beliefs and understanding. That’s always been there, but not quite so openly as it is becoming now. As I do, there’s always that chatter in the back of my mind to tone it down and not turn anyone off. Which is not easy for someone who really doesn’t like vanilla anything. Yet, I’ve spent a lot of energy in my life being just that, vanilla as can be.
I have no doubt that speaking what’s true for me will turn some people off. It’s okay. I’m not for everyone. I think our true purpose in life is to figure out who we are and be true to that. That means shedding all the ways in which we’re still trying to fit in.
Embracing my perceived imperfections has been an essential part of this journey. For so long, I thought I had to be perfect to be accepted. Every flaw, every mistake felt like a spotlight was shining on it, magnifying my inadequacies. But what I’ve come to realize is that these imperfections are not just parts of me; they are what make me WHOLE.
When I stopped striving for an unattainable perfection, I started to come home to myself. This homecoming has been a process of gentle acceptance, acknowledging my quirts, my mistakes, and even my perceived failures are all integral to my being. It’s in this space of self-approval that I find my true strength and resilience.
Embracing my imperfections allows me to connect with others on a deeper level. It seems that showing my true self gives others permission to do the same. And there’s a profound sense of freedom in not having to wear a mask or pretend.
In this journey of self-approval, I am hell-bent on being “out there” now. I was always meant to be. Because being out there means I am showing up fully in all my imperfect glory, and there is power in that. It is a radical act of self-love, declaring that I am enough, just as I am.
There is tremendous beauty in vulnerability and showing up as our wildly imperfect selves. I welcome you to join me.
With Love,
Let’s have an adventure being ‘out there’ together at The Wildly Imperfect Summer Camp!