Love Letter #140: You Never Really Go Home

This week, I’m pet and house-sitting in the house I sold two years ago. It was purchased by a dear friend, and she’s traveling this week. So, Gracie and I are taking care of her dog Zoe and staying the week.

It’s interesting being in a home that is so familiar yet everything is changed. There’s the familiar natural light from the fifteen windows in this little bungalow. That was the first thing I noticed when I looked at the house thirteen years ago. Lots of natural light is important to me in a home. No curtains, just window blinds to filter the light when necessary and give some privacy at night. 

There’s a great soaking tub in the bathroom, hardwood floors throughout, and a sweet second-floor office I designed, and my sister and Brian helped me build. It too has great light and hardwood floors. It no longer feels like my office. 

I was thinking, you can never really go home. I’ve tried that a few times. It doesn’t work. Because even if the home you left is completely the way you left it, you are different. Deciding to sell this home changed me. I had to do a lot of letting go and trusting my intuition. 

When I came to buy this house, I was newly divorced. This home was a healing sanctuary for me. A place I could make my own, and remake myself in the process. Twelve years later, I am not the same woman. 

I am much more secure within myself. I’ve realized how little I really need to be happy, and I am more willing to keep moving forward on this path, more willing to leave behind the good for the better. 

This path hasn’t always been easy. Since I arrived this afternoon, there have been moments of sadness as I move about this familiar space. At the same time, I have never been more certain I made the right choice. 

As I move through my studies in Metaphysical ministry, my life is shifting once more. While I don’t yet know where this is taking me, I have faith that the Divine Presence within me is guiding and directing me, and doing the work as me perfectly.

And I know I am always at home within myself. 

With love,

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